Take Your 80s Nostalgia, And Blow It Out Your Ass

Look, I recognize that for many people, the 80s was the last time you were good looking or were able to convince good looking people to have sex with you. Now you look over at whatever harpy or troglodyte you're stuck with for life, hear your little brats fighting upstairs and think, man, I miss the 80s. I'm sorry to tell you that you are correct to miss the 80s, but that they still sucked.

A quick comment about Beware The Batman

There is some folk wisdom that says that if a Batman show has a "The" in its title, its relative placement before or after the word "Batman" could determine the quality of the show. If it came before, the show would be inferior; if after, superior. This is why Batman: THE Animated Series and Batman: THE Brave & THE Bold are classic television programming while THE Batman and THE New Adventures Of Batman are essentially warmed up doo doo butter.

Now it appears that Beware THE Batman might force us to throw this conventional rule of thumb out. It's pretty fantastic so far.

Neanderthals: An Ontological Fable

The Neanderthals were like us. They had beliefs, and thoughts. They buried their dead and laid flowers at the grave. Now they're all gone and no one really gives a shit. There's a lesson here somewhere.