Church!

There's people that actually, honestly believe there is a fairy-tale magic man with a beard in the sky watching their every move, and that if they don't all come together in a room once a week and let some guy read to them out of a book that's so old people didn't even know the world was round when it was written; that unless they pretend not to be bored during this weekly reading, that the magic beard man will throw them into flames FOREVER. Quaint, no?